Time passes so quickly….

I remembered somebody told me before that after 25 years old, time seems to pass faster than you expected. It seemed to be true in a way because it seems to be just yesterday that I parted again with my LCM brothers and sisters but April is already waving towards me.  Last wednesday was the last day of level 3. Yeah!! This time I passed my finals too with flying colors! I got 97 for reading comprehension, 92 for listening, 85 for speaking and 68 for writing. I gave myself a pat on my shoulders.. I have did well ..  Actually it is not about the good results that I received but the process that I see that God is with me and that I am enjoying each day walking with God. This semester, I participated actively in class, answered all my teachers’ questions in class, participated in the choir especially created to sing for the 200th time level 6 graduating classes. 

hehe.. snap shot from a friend's camera..

Waiting for our cute conductor's signal

I have made quite a few friends in this choir group. It actually comprises some of the students from level 3, 4 and 5 who wish to volunteer for this choir presentation. We sang 2 songs. 축복하노라 and “Butterfly” from the movie 국가대표. As Yonsei is a christian school, we sang hymns during the graduation ceremony and there are prayers and benediction by pastor during the opening and ending of the graduation. It was an eye opener! As we congratuate the level 6 graduating  classes, I was wondering if I will have the chance too to receive the honor of graduation. I will pray and see how God leads me. This time I have a break for a week and level 4 starts again on the 2nd of April. I guess I would be staying at home most of the time, doing some reading and revision for the topik test that I have signed up on the 15th April. The topik test is a world-wide recognised test for korean language. I hope to get least get a level 3 pass.  🙂

When I hold on to God’s promise……

It’s been a month since I last update my blog. There are so many happenings for this month. The UPs and DOWNs, the inner deep thoughts with God, and God’s work on me.

UPs

Since the start of school, I realised that my korean speaking skills has improved and I am now able to express myself better regardless  in class or when I’m  outside. Actually, although I’m a sister, sometimes, I do have a lot of pride in the things that I do. Therefore, initially, the thought of repeating level 3 really hurt my pride. But I know there must be a reason for it. This time round, I ask God to lead me. This time round, for the mid term exam, I was shocked when I received my results. I got 85 marks for speaking, 88marks for listening, 85.7marks for writing and 62 for reading comprehension. I was delighted! Probably for a person who doesn’t know God will say, “haiz, why did I only get 62 for reading comprehension?” For me, I said,”Lucky that God did not give me all 80plus because I will become too proud!” I am really happy because I enjoyed the process with God’s presence. My teacher also told me that it is not easy for students to get 85 for speaking in level 3.  (grinz)

DOWNs

Today is the day that we sent our dear sister Sungmin to be with the Lord. Sister Sungmin is 1 yr younger than me. She is a sister who really loves all the brothers and sisters in the church. She is vibrant and never gets angry when teased by us. She starting leading a cell this year and she never fails to take care of her cell members. Even when she could not make it for cell meetings, she reports to the pastor on everyone’s problems and needs.  On last Friday morning, she was knocked down by a car near our church. Suddenly, she left us. We cannot believe it. The last time I seen her was last Saturday on our church friend’s wedding. That day, she even told me that seeing so many people getting married, we should faster find some nice guy too. She was supposed to go US in March to visit her sister who lives in US because it is her niece’s 1st year birthday. She asked me to teach her english because she is afraid that she could not communicate in US. I learnt that Life is so fragile. Our life is in God’s hands. Yes, we are all shocked and sad. Although she is leaving earlier than us, I believe that we will meet again together with the Lord someday.  Makes me wonder, what does God want me to do in this short frame of lifetime? Remember that I mentioned that I am thankful for God for each new day in my previous blog? Now, I am even more grateful of each new day.

Brothers and sisters, have you thought of what God wants you to do in this life? Some people might answer, ya, I know.. but not now. Yea, I know God wants me to do this.. but not now. I haven’t enjoy enough of this world, I haven’t prepare myself yet. But, when will you be enjoying enough of this world? When will you be prepared? In a wink, time flies.. when God decides to bring you back home, will you be telling him, “God, I haven’t do the things that you want me to do yet!” I Hope that nobody will have regrets someday…..

A new spiritual start

In the year 2011, I have done many things that may not be pleasing to God.. Because of all these things, often, I get condemnation but I know, God loves me. HE does not look at the things that I have done. HE does not see if I love him more because HE still loves me. In fact, HE loves me more each day. I will not apologise to God anymore for the “bad” things that I have done.. Because by apologising, Satan has already quietly accused me… Now, everyday, I thank God for giving me a chance to live another day. I know that this year will be a new spiritual year for me. Welcoming God’s grace and plan for me.  

School has started for a week..  Repeating level 3 allows me to revise the grammars and vocabs.. My 2 teachers are good.. classmates comprises of  honkees, americans, japanese and chinese, friendly too..  Everyday, I played my role as a student, and I went home straight after school and did my homework. Saturday is the day that I listen to sunday messages. I hope that I can sustain this spiritual strength everyday. I still miss my brethrens and family everyday.. I know they miss me too. keke.. If anyone of you reading this miss me, send me a wassapp text ya? my korea phone number is +82-10-8463-0393.

Although my blog is short today.. i’m sure that it is written with strength provided by God. Gotta go cook my dinner already. 🙂 byyee….

 

 

2012 New Year Prayer Topic

On the 1st  night of 2012, I suddenly have the urge to visit our church website to listen to our brethrens’ testimonies. I search high and low.. but could not find. In the end, I message Rev Zhiming asking about whether we will be updating the testimonies on the church website. I did not get a response instantly. The 2nd day morning, I saw Rev Zhiming’s reply saying that the testimonies will be updated by liwen. So, I messaged Liwen. hmm.. Strangely, this time, why am I so eager to hear our brethrens’ sharings? In the past, I used to “escape” from year end sharings because of various “ridiculous” reasons that you can never think of.  This time, I am like “chasing” our dear liwen to upload it.. keke…

Finally this morning when  I woke up, I got a message from Rev Zhiming that the sharings are uploaded. I was excited! Couldn’t really describe the excitment but.. I was really excited.. I on the computer, and started my “marathon” listening..  Attentively, I listened to 5 brother and sisters’ sharings. Adrienne, Weiming, Xiumin, Meiling and then Shiya. I finally cried when I was listening to Sis Shiya’s sharing. As you all may not know, sister shiya is 1 of my dear sister in christ. I am not saying other sisters are not dear to me… in case u all are jealous.. keke.. every sister is dear to me.. especially my cell group sisters, my cell leader and “ho ho ho…” but sister shiya, really relates to my heart. For the past six months in Seoul, she often Wasapp me asking about my well-being and encouraging me with god’s words.

All the sharings really touched my heart and makes me reflect on what has God done on me for the past 29 years. All the trials and the tests.. all the valuable processes and experience that God wants me to learn from… Suddenly, everything verge to my mind. This year, I’m turning 30.. and it is really time to sit down and pray about what God wants me to do in my life. I hope it is not too late because I still remember my prayer to God when I was 19. I told God that I want to be a unique woman with vision. AND TRUE… For the next 10years, life is like a roller coaster to me. I have gone thru the worst of my life, but God still never leaves me. HE is the only “perservering/pastering boyfriend” that I could ever have.  No matter how I try to dump him, he never leaves.

This year, my prayer topics… As I continue to study in Seoul, I will continue to pray for God to let me see what he really wants me to do…  I really hope to see that for the year that I spent in Seoul is not worthless. I might come back for good in June.. I might still continue… but it will depend on how God guides me after prayer. Also, I want to pray for my parents’ salvation. I know that it is not easy but nothing is impossible in God. This Dec when I went home, I can feel that my parents really wished that I can come back to Singapore too. I drew even closer to them day by day, spending time talking to them.  Especially my mom… Although I always liked my dad over my mom..(pls dun tell her.. haha..) but my mom is always in my mind. Her loneliness when nobody is at home while my dad is working… I hope that God will open her eyes to see his salvation’s door. Lastly, I want to pray for the life partner God has prepared for me. This is my Long waited prayer and I will rely and wait upon him with “excited heart” because after so long… the BEST will come…….

Snowing outside while I'm updating my blog... thou the picture cant really tell that it is snowing..

 

Level 3 mid term test

Hi guys.. Sorry for not updating my blog for weeks. I just finished my level 3 mid term exams 2 weeks and sad to say, i failed 2 out of 4 subjects this time. The 1st paper that I got back wa writing. I never imagine that I will fail writing because this time I started studying for the test very early and studied with my friends and asked questions. During the 1 to 1 talk for the oral results, I pretend to look ok but when my teacher keep saying 어떻게?? 지넷!! 힘네! I cannot hold my tears anymore.. I did not wanna cry especially because I know my classnates all had 90over for their subjects! At that moment, thoughts came to my mind. Why can they get 90over while I am struggling here??  57.5 -> oral test(3min talk is 17.5/20 and 1to1 oral  is 40/80)  76 ->listening 54.2-> writing and 73.5-> reading plus understanding passages.

나 바보야?? This thinking keep haunting me…  근데,분명 이유가있어. 나 바보 아니예요! 나는 하나님의 아이예요!! Why am I special? Why am I different?? That night, i posted on facebook, “Should I give up and go home?” I really had the urge to go home because I really felt disappointed and stupid..  That night on facebook, my ex company Finance Director pm me.. ” Having trials?” I said, ” ya, kind of…” He send me a link to ” Because he lives, I can face tomorrow.” I cried and knelt down humbly to God. I was wrong.. God didn’t put me here to crush my confidence or anything, He wants me to lean on him….  

I am different! That is why.. The important thing is not about the results.. It is the process. I have to remind myself. I’m also not here to stress myself to get good results..

I thank God that I was able to recover within that night. My church friend was very nice. She was afraid that I might feel down but when I met her on friday, she said,” you don’t look sad.” I told her.. “I was yesterday but I handed everything to God so, there is no worry now. She was amazed…. 🙂

A

Something to share

Today, I’m not writing anything.. Just to share this korean hymn that I like. 주의 손에 나의 손을 포개고 . It means something like God’s hand is on my hand… Enjoy… keke… sorry, I still cannot find the translation… will try to find..

주의 손에 나의 손을 포개고

 

God’s Angels

Last weekend was especially a long weekend for me because I did not go to school on Friday as I was running a fever and Monday was a public holiday in Korea. I did not even step out of my house for the 4 days as I was still recovering from my injury and fever… plus, it is super cold outside. The weather now in Seoul is crazy! It is supposed to be FALL and it is like 8 degrees??? There is change in temperature everyday so we have to check the weather everyday before we decide what to wear.

That Sunday, I was at home. Thinking that since I missed the sunday service, I decided to listen to Pastor Vincent’s sunday message instead. Was listening to ” If Have “Christ’s Perspectives” In All Things, Will Receive Holy Spirit’s Conviction In All Things”.. I must say that I really need this msg at this moment.. and I AMEN it… 🙂 In the evening, my church friend called me(the Singapore friend who brought me to the korean church). He knew that I was sick so his girlfriend cooked and packed dinner for me. I was super touched because it has been very long since I ate mixed vegetable rice! (Although I hate it when I was in Singapore). But I ate every spoonful with thankfulness in my heart. God sent his angels to feed me…

The next day, my friend again sent packed lunch for me! with red dates water. Although I thanked them for being so nice, deep in my heart, I whispered to God, “Thank  you lord! You love me more than anyone else. You know that I feel down and upset with no friends helping when I needed help but you sent Angels to remind me that you are always here.”

After having the nice meals comes the hard work. I was supposed to remove the bandage MYSELF because the nurses said that it will not hurt as much if I do it myself. Lame and excuses. I spent 5 hours removing the bandage on my thighs and abdomen and the best part is why does it take so long?? Because after removing the sticky bandage, all the adhesive are stuck on my skin. I had to use olive oil and a rug to remove them. Although I did grumble a bit.. but, overall, I finally took out the bandage myself on Sun night.

Today, I just went to remove some stitches. So, I’m better now everyone. Just still bruises on my thighs… So dun worry… I’m always under God’s wings.. may it be good or bad… So, when I recover the vision of looking at things using God’s perspective,  I will definitely Holy Spirit’s conviction…. AMEN!!

School reopens

Today is the day that school reopens..  3 long weeks of holiday just passed quickly…Actually, I am a bit reluctant to go to school today because I’m injured.. (pls do not tell my parents).. and to make things worse, it was raining heavily this morning.. I have bruises on my thights and backside and abdomen.. Chest a bit pain too..  Firstly, It sucks because i’m in a foreign country with no friends… For the first 2 days I had to stay in a motel because I cant walk properly and sit properly and the scary thins is, i need to climb up to my bed .. I’m feeling better now… dun worry.. just walk a bit slow because I’m” wrapped” up with tape.. Secondly, it sucks because I have to wear like big clothings because of the swelling too. Without make up and walking slowly and style like an “AR JU MA”,  I had to attend the 1st day of level 3.   

The reason that I went to school even though in pain is because there are 20 classes in level 3 and  I was to class number 16. In Yonsei, the classes behind are the better students… and the teacher will tend to teach faster. So, if i had the need to change class, I have to let the teacher know on the first day. Indeed, the students in my class speaks fluently like koreans… Fwah.. I tell you… I dont evem dare to open my mouth.. I really dunno why God puts me in this class. Is it to make my speaking better? Or? I seriously do not know… I am praying to god that if this is the class that you want me to go to, surely, there is a reason behind it. But whAT? Haiz.. I dunno. Maybe in this state now, I cant hear God’s voice…

Also, I’m feeling terrible is because when I was injuried, I asked help from Masako and another friend, but they were both busy and couldn’t help me even though they know I need help.  Masako did came the 2nd day but told me to stay in motel and she will come the next day to accompany me to the hospital but in the end, she had appointments. My another friend went to Busan while I called but did came this morning to help me on the books to school but today after school, my friend promised to go to the hospital with me but in the end left school without calling me, Am I asking for too much, God???? Is God telling me to lean on him instead??? I dunno but I seriously hope that he can show me the way…

My parents in Seoul

Last Tuesday, my parents arrived Seoul to visit me.  I woke up at 530am to get ready to go incheon airport to fetch them. Actually for this trip here, they brought a big luggage of stuffs for me. (most are requested by me..keke). They brought my shoes, speaker, oat, milk powder, water bottles, thermal pot, ingredients for me to cook porridge and dessert, like scallop,white fungus etc… (sorry.. too many I dunno how to list them one by one..),  

It is super expensive to take a cab from Incheon Airport. Therefore, we took a train to their hotel. It was hard for them because there are many staircases in korea. We Singaporeans are too fortunate to have elevators and lifts everywhere. But in korea, people walk a lot and the staircases in subway stations is A LOT!! Even changing lines… some subway stations do not have escalators, so my parents had to climb the stairs. When we reached the hotel at 1015am, the hotel staff said that the check in time is 2pm… we had to leave the luggages at the reception and come back later in the afternoon.  Therefore, dragging the big luggage full of my stuffs, I told my parents to go my place first. I felt quite bad when I saw my dad carrying the luggage up and down the stairs in the subway. Even carrying the luggage up my house (I’m staying in the 4th floor and there is no lift.) He refused to let me help.. Helplessly looking at him panting, at that moment, I suddenly feel that my dad has aged so much.. The last time our family went traveling together, my dad is always the HERO carry the heavy luggages.. This time, when I saw him dragging the luggages, I feel like crying.. My dad indeed is the HERO in my heart. He never fails to do anything that I requested him to do, he cooks, he always looks after my needs and make sure that I’m happy… I wanted to tell him so much that I loved him…. Although I do not have a boyfriend now, I’m so glad that God has given this wonderful dad that loves me so dearly. He may look stern and does not know how to express his love, I know he loves me…

For the 5 days that my parents were in Seoul, I met them everyday for dinner except Wed. My parents tour group only had the 2 of them. Therefore, it is more flexible to meet them. I know my mom is very happy too as she bought a lot of facial stuffs, ginseng, a pair of sports shoes, and she got me a cross pendant. Once again, I know, my parents acknowledged the God that I believe.  On the last day, I went lunch with them, took them to supermarket to buy some stuffs back to Singapore. In the evening, I took the tour guide’s car and went to the airport with them.

I know that my parents specially came korea to visit me. It is their main purpose here. I am so happy that they came and brought so many stuffs from Singapore for me.  They even went to the supermarket and bought a lot of necessities for me, bought many adbo facial products for me, bought me lunches, dinners. Even before my dad left for Singapore, he gave me the remaining money he had.. I do not know how to describe my feelings but I really thank God that I had such wonderful parents…..

1st Birthday in Seoul

 

Yesterday was my 29th birthday..  I thought it was going to be a lonely and quiet Birthday.. But God knows that I wish there will be friends to celebrate with me… But of course, even if my birthday is with God alone, I’m still thankful to HIM for being with me for another new day….

 In the morning, I went for service at 11am. After service, my church friends surrounded me and sang korean birthday song loudly in the middle of the streets near my church. At that moment, I can feel the warmth in my heart (><,) and I whispered to God, “thank you”.. I suddenly miss our Life Church Brothers and Sisters.. I guess they will do the same too… keke…

Then, I met Masako, my Japaanese classmate for lunch….We went to eat at a restuarant that served good “Bu dae Cchi gay..” (army hotpot with many hotdog, meat, ramen, vegetables, tofu, etc)..  I am specially thankful to God that she came back from Korea especially to celebrate my birthday  

After Lunch, we went to Myeongdong, where I met up with 2 Singapore girls that I know from the National Day Celebration in Seoul and we went to Forever 21 to shop!! OMG!! there are sooooo many sale for the summer clothes.. Temptation is great but I still managed to calm myself by telling God that I will only buy the fall and winter clothes because I need them…. IN THE END… after 4 hours in F21, I spent 175,000won, which is about S$200 for buying 7 items… I almost fainted!! keke…

From Left Yi En, Masako, Me, Mirabel

After the “SWEEP” my friends suggested that we go Baskin Robbins for dessert..After buying the ice-cream cone, they turn around to me and starting singing the  Singapore version of Happy Birthday… keke… Super Touched!   They are so nice to buy my favorite flavors.. TwinBerry Cheesecake and Chocolate nuts.. Yum Yum…

 

 

After Dessert, Mirabel and Yi En went to meet their friends, so Masako and I waited for Qiulyng

(the s’pore friend that came to seoul with me) for dinner.  We had Pane and Pasta in Myeongdong…

 Nice steak and pasta.. 

 

After dinner, we went “No Re Bang”(KTV).. where Masako and Qiulyng bought me a Baskin Robbins

 Snowman Ice-cream cake… and we sang for 2 solid hours…! keke…

 

Card made by Masako!!